First off, apologises for the title but I’ve got our attention. Why? I knew Australia was passionate about its beef, but until you’ve seen a rather large sign on the side of the main road with a talking cow cloth the speech bubble “Eat Beef You Bas#**ds!” then you truly don’t understand their appreciation for beef. Moving on, we continued our journey onto Hervey Bay, base for the very so popular Fraser Island. We weren’t entirely convinced on a tour but it seemed bizarre to have travelled the distance, hook up the caravanita and not even see this so called famous island. So as any savvy traveller would do, we scrolled TripAdvisor to find a company with a decent reputation and boarded a bus of the most stereotypical Australian tour guide. Yes, he had the hat, he was sporting the classic Steven Irvin shirt and trousers and his accent drilled through the speakers as if an 18 year old wore a hearing aid at a Stone Roses concert. Needless to say the tour was fun, it was interesting being aboard a 4×4 bus being rocked side to side being driving through the dense sand island. First stop was the gorgeous lake Mckenzie. It’s hard not to admire what so far I can consider the only lake in the world to look like a paradise beach. In the sun, it’s crystal clear waters dazzled spectators as we could simply only stand there and admire it’s beauty…literally stand because we didn’t have much time before the bus left again (that’s tours for you). After a small jungle walk we proceeded to an activity many could not put on their life experience cv, being driven in a 4×4 bus on a beach considered officially a highway. That being said, after the initial ‘wow’ moment, it’s kudos soon ran out and our tour seemed to stretch out its remaining more insignificant sites. Regardless of our desire to prove ourselves right to have not gone on a tour, we experience a very pleasant and surreal walk knee deep in a creek, poetry not intended, The ride back was long an tedious, not to mention, if you ever even feel the slightest desire to go to the loo, despite it maybe being a little bit inconvenient before the journey back, just go. I experience one of the most desperate and painful moments in my life as that 4×4 rattled me from side to side and over the bumpiest of bumps…trust me when I say someone making the sound of trickling water would of been a delightful swap.